How To Deal With Breakup When You Share A Place


Breakups are not easy, and they can be especially challenging when you live in the same house. It’s not always possible to just move out and get a new place the next day. If you find yourself in this situation, here are several guidelines that will help you survive the experience.

Set boundaries

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If you no longer want to continue the relationship, you have to create space just for yourself. It could be that the comfiest place to sleep in the house is a bed for two, but now that you are no longer a couple, it’s not healthy to share a bed. Your first priority should be to find a separate place to sleep.

Don’t be tempted to get back together just for the sake of it

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Once you exit a difficult relationship, you may feel relieved. This feeling can make you think that it wasn’t all that bad and that you can start over again. In most cases, it’s just an illusion and an attempt to avoid making a serious decision. You should remain aware of your feelings and not let your heart rule your head, which can be tough when you see the other person every day.

Get a mediator

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Dividing possessions can seem like a nightmare, especially when you’ve lived with your partner for a while. One way you can deal with the situation is to ask a mutual friend to be there when you do it. The very presence of another person can make everyone calmer, so you will be able to complete the task with less stress.

Set a specific move out date

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It’s a good idea to have a specific date on the horizon when you know that one or both of you are going to move out of the shared place. You don’t want to end up postponing moving out indefinitely and feel awkward discussing the topic over and over again. Once the date is set, you can start moving on in your own head.

Don’t be in a rush

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When we get hurt, we tend to make the worst decisions because of our negative emotions. If you are not sure that you can think straight enough to tackle things like dividing your possessions, you need some time to cool off. You don’t want to look back and realize that you forgot something important and need to go back.

Relationships are often messy and confusing, but approaching things with a certain degree of rationality can always help.

Source: eHarmony

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